The transition to becoming a mother is a beautiful, complex, and exhausting experience - each of us at Team Gunamuna have our own experience (ups and downs, happy tears, sleepless nights, crying in the shower, etc.) with becoming a mom a first, second, and even third time. The most important thing for each of us was remembering that you're not along - and that this transition can have both moments of joy AND bumps.
Today, we are sharing thoughts from Karen Shanahan, L.M.H.C. of Coastal Therapy, on ways to be gentle on yourself during this transition - and how to find yourself during the transition to 'Mom.'
"Who Was I Before This?
If you could remember you and your partner before baby, that is great, but can you remember who you were?! So quickly our identification of mom becomes paramount and, given the intensity of this role, it can be easy to feel we have lost our previous selves.
It is easy to lose sight of the fact that you are still that person and that all the qualities that make you the mom you are, are the same things that made you the person you were before being a mom. Slow down to remember and give yourself major props for what you have accomplished.
Maybe your incredible body grew and birthed a child- rockstar! Maybe, after years of battle, you brought a child into the love that is your family- warrior! Maybe you took a child from their own battle and made sacrifices so they could have the life they deserve- guardian-angel!
However you took on the new role of parent, you took it on. You added it to all the things you were before and the truth is, you won’t ever be who you were before because now you are something even bigger and stronger. Those other parts of yourself aren’t gone. They may have stepped back to allow the new piece of your identity to take the stage, but they are all still there and will emerge in their own time.
When you miss them, give yourself time to be with those pieces of yourself- call the friend who brings out your sassy side, watch the show that helps you connect to your humor, go to the workout class that reminded you how strong you were. And then also recognize those parts of yourself when you are in your mommy role- you may be surprised how you access all those attributes daily!"